I freaked out because I realized that I don't look any different and my pant size is still the same. I had started to doubt why the heck I even started this stupid journey and why I would put something so hard and so personal on the freaking internet... I mean... How dumb are you!?
After a terrible run, a couple episodes of the walking dead, and a nights sleep. I woke up angry but determined.
That determination was soon brought to light as motives that would not last. A dear friend and huge cheerleader for me, reminded me that I started this whole thing not to lose weight or look different in a mirror, but to be healthy. What I put in my body, what I eat, if I smoke, how much I exercise-- all of those things can and do affect how I feel physically, mentally, and spiritually.
So today, I am choosing to eat healthy. I am choosing to go for a bike ride, I am choosing to read scripture. Because the things I put in my body and in my mind influence the way I live.
When I got home from work today I found two letters in the mail from a couple of people who are dear to me. Both were letters of encouragement. They were such a blessing, so I thank you Kristen Hoover and sweet baby Rachel Guthall.
Rachel left me with a beautiful chunk of scripture that I am going to leave with you now:
"Let us approach the throne of grace with confidence that we may receive mercy and grace to help us in our time of need"- Hebrews 4:16
Holy crap... I could sure use some grace and mercy...
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